Have Reasonable Expectations of Your Children’s Behavior
Posted by Dr. Noel Swanson.. | Filed under Health & Fitness
Expectations are important in life as they form the foundation of our conduct and behavior. Parents have expectations that form a vague picture of what their children should grow up to be. These expectations are formed unconsciously from our own wants and desires.
As a parent, it is your duty to discover and develop his hidden talents and not impose your own desires on him to fulfill your dreams. The key is to have positive and reasonable expectations for your children. But, it is not easy to draw a line between reasonable and unreasonable expectations.
How do you know if an expectation is reasonable? The first thing to do is research. Does it seem like a lot of work? It just might be. Parenting isn’t easy. You make it up as you go along, based on the foundations and parenting advice left to you by others and your own heart to guide you.
These books will also help you look at your child more objectively. It means that you will look at the child and his capacity without bringing your own desires and aspirations into it. For instance, if the established guideline is that children don’t develop full sentence speech till they are at least a year old, expecting a full sentence out of your six-month old isn’t a reasonable expectation.
If you know your child is doing his or her best in school, and they are an average student, expecting average grade work is reasonable because they are doing their best and you know it’s their best. Child behavior expectations take a bit of common sense. And it is important to establish reasonable expectations of your children.
Remember, unreasonable expectations lead to disappointment. You can save yourself a lot of frustration if you keep your expectations reasonable. Unreasonable expectations can damage the self-esteem of the child irreparably. So, be very conscious of what you expect your child do; he may not be able to measure up to some of your expectations.
Of course, you must set reasonable expectations in child behavior or child discipline in different areas. After that you should formulate a set of goals and hold to them. Let your child know when he meets those expectations by rewarding him. This will help you take him further on the road to success, but at his pace, not yours.
The key to parenting is to remember not to push your desires onto your children. It often happens that parents impose their own unfulfilled dreams on their children and expect them to achieve what they failed to do in their lifetime. Nothing can be worse than this. So, take some time out and look at your expectations and assess how reasonable they are. Reasonable expectations promote growth and positive self image and are an essential parenting skill.
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Tags: ADD, ADHD, child behavior, child behavior problems, Health & Fitness, parenting, parenting tips, temper tantrums
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